I’ve known Anna my whole life. As kids I used to follow her around and mimic whatever she used to do (like recording ourselves dancing to Aaron Carter’s songs!) She was the older sister I never had who looked out for me both in school and at home.
As we got older, she continued to inspire me in both her career and other aspects of her life. Her story on coming full circle - having a child through adoption and becoming a mother is one that I hope will inspire and help shed some light to other moms & parents who are considering adoption. While no two adoption stories are the same, we are grateful to Anna and her partner for sharing their adoption story with us.
*Hello! tell us a little bit about yourself and your little family.
Hello! I’m Arianna, and I’m the founder & owner of Spatula. I’ve currently been married to my partner, S, for almost 7 years, and we’ve recently had a little boy added to our family earlier this year.
*Can you share with us a bit about your adoption story?
I’ve always known that I wanted to adopt, even since I was a teenager. I’ve always felt very strongly for it, and one of the things I was adamant about doing in life. After five years of being married, and settling into our respective careers, my partner and I felt that it was the right time to start thinking about expanding our family.
Adoption in Singapore (as with almost any other country, I would assume) is not an easy process. It’s a pretty long and tedious journey that requires patience, and a degree of emotional resilience.
Our journey started in March 2020, right at the cusp of the whole Covid situation. This threw our adoption process in a frenzy, as we faced more roadblocks than what any other couple probably would have experienced in any other non-Covid time. We faced many ups and downs - highs in receiving the highly-anticipated Placement Phonecall, and lows when these placements fell through and failed, for various reasons. We had a total of three failed placement opportunities throughout our entire journey, before finally being able to bring our baby boy home in May 2021.
*Do you have any advice for other parents looking to adopt too?
Adoption is not as taboo today, as it may have been in the past. That being said, it does present its own unique set of challenges - how will you manoeuvre the child’s sense of identity loss, or potential resentment upon realising his/her story? If you have, or will have, a biological child, how will you ensure fairness and equality in both children, and especially in how your extended family members treat both children?
It’s crucial to have extremely thorough conversations with your partner, as well as with your extended family, on the potential adopted child’s upbringing, and how you intend to mould him/her, and tackle any future issues that the child may face.
Nonetheless, it’s not as daunting as it may seem, as long as you’re able to acknowledge the little extra bit of parenting challenges that adoption presents.
*How has motherhood been so far for you and what is the most rewarding thing about it?
I’ve always loved kids and spending time with them, and so I’ve honestly enjoyed (most) of my time the last several months. As with any individual entering parenthood, it has been somewhat of an adjustment, particularly no longer having huge chunks of time to myself anymore, but instead, tending to and being responsible for a little human most parts of my day. The most rewarding thing about parenthood is to see our little boy smile and laugh, knowing that we make him happy and feel safe. I truly hope that he continues to feel joy throughout his life with us.